Sad

I just found out that my grandmother passed away. We were expecting it, but just not in this way. She had a stroke a couple of weeks ago, and she wasn't doing well. They were transporting her today from dialysis back to the place where she was staying for rehab. The ambulance she was in rear ended a TDOT truck. She was killed along with one of the other people in the ambulance, a volunteer firefighter from Franklin. I honestly don't know what to say. I am home alone, and I just don't know what to say. I just wasn't expecting her to pass away this way. I was expecting a peaceful death. I mean we knew her death was coming, and we had been preparing for it. She hadn't been doing well for a long time now. I am just so worried that she suffered in some way. I feel so guilty because I am here in California and not home in TN. I know how Jack felt last week when we found out that his aunt had passed away. I just feel so helpless.